When I decided to move to NY eight years ago, I had such a different idea of where my life was headed. I got signed to a great modeling agency, and having worked-my-butt-off perfecting my portfolio with tear sheets from LA [from the years prior] I was ready to make the big apple my bitch. Like many untold stories of not so happy endings... my dreams of grandeur came up a bit shy. So much of our media tells these Cinderella stories of people's struggles before making it big.... But what about us who worked just as hard, who didn't quite get that breakout spot? For me, I left New York completely heartbroken. I went back to LA with my tail between my legs to try and gather what was left of myself and start over, again. I had spent the past 15 years putting my blood, sweat, and tears into the modeling industry hoping to make it into a career, and now I was back to square one. Forgoing college to work was just one of the countless opportunities I missed out on. I was left looking for a job with a blank resume, and my only remnants of work is a portfolio of pictures that unless I was selling my body on Craigslist (which I would never) was my only known way of make money. Being a perfectionist, I can't help but be ashamed of where I am at present day, "my hopes in the sky and my heart like grape gum on the ground"...but life experiences are priceless and I wouldn't change a single thing. I am now heading back to New York to re-visit one of my favorite cities and some of my very favorite people. This time without expectations, except to have the best time! Here are some of my travel necessities.
NY State Of Mind