I should have trusted my trust issues.

I have been on my own for so long, and in doing so have naturally kept myself guarded.  Being alone in a big city at a young age, I was always extremely cautious with the company I surround myself with [in hopes to protect myself].  I like to think that I have an innate instinct when it comes to people I meet and  open up to.  I went through a phase of trusting people I shouldn't and saw that got me no where, but hurt.  It's hard when you see red flags go up, but you want to give people the benefit of the doubt.  -Just to realize not everyone is worthy of that treatment.  When you go against your gut, just to find out later you were right from the start, opens up a lot of internal battles for me.  You can't always get to the end goal alone, but you also can't get there on a really shitty team.  It's hard not to feel jaded and just keep to yourself, but there is a bad stigma attached to being a shut-in.

In hopes of shedding some light on this rambling, I think sometimes you have to characterize people by their actions, so you will never be fooled by their words.  -And if you are a bottom feeder leaching on to "nice people" for your sick game... Fuck you!  I am a nice person...until I'm not nice anymore.