Humpty Dumpty

So today is the first day of spring.  That means I am officially a season behind in my goal to have a summer body.  I literally feel like Humpty Dumpty; in that my body is falling apart and I am literally the shape of a potato.  Ironically, Humpty Dumpty is an egg, and I was under the assumption that eggs are one of the highest-quality forms of proteins.  That shows how much I know...I guess eggs can cause damage too...you also need eggs for muffins; and my muffin top is the proof of the pudding (no pun intended in the food references, I'm just hungry).  When you look and feel like shit you begin to resemble it.  Unfortunately this tonal brown look isn't doing me any favors.  This striped shirt from Urban Outfitters stretched from a men's medium into a maternity top in just a matter of minutes...and these Zara sweats are made with the worst fabrication causing my sweat pants to feel like a sweatshop for my junk.    When you feel like 💩 you look like 💩.  I'll start my diet tomorrow.