I know it's over when I don't even want you when I am drunk.

2016 has sucked a bag of dicks.  For me it was full of loss.  The only good thing I've lost this year are a few pounds.

I am still in Minnesota, so I found out in Eastern/Central time that I am on this weeks episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Minnesota; Home of the 1987 World Series Champion Twins, Mall of America, and Me!

Merry Christmas from mine to yours!

I'm on a boat.  -And I'm finally on Christmas Vacation!  The first thing that pops into my head when I hear "Christmas" is the movie, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (it's a family tradition). 

Fashion week is right around the corner, but you don't need to go to New York (to feel like you are at the Mercedes Bens tents) just go to Crunch on Sunset Blvd. 

...you'll always be chasing after people who don't love you either.  Loving someone who doesn't love you is like waiting for a ship at the airport. 

Someone just left me a voicemail and I can’t help but feel attacked!  Nowadays there are very few occasions when calling me is acceptable

A few years ago I had a roommate who later would be a reality TV star. 

If you were NICE this year, you won't be getting a gift from me ...because we clearly aren't friends.  When I found these flasks in the shape of these "common items", my Christmas shopping was done immediately

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.  It's so sad to see; watching someone with a broken-heart go on a tyrant path of destruction simply because they are unable to deal with their emotions.